The family environment is the first place where the correct attitude towards worship, and in particular Salah, can be taught to children. If a child grows up in an environment where the religion and its teachings are shown love, given importance, and explained with truth and sincerity, there is hope that the child will in turn respect these teachings as they grow older. Children will observe the belief that their parents have in the hearts towards Salah, and how much motivation they have to observe it and to learn its rules correctly.
It’s very important for parents to learn about the importance, benefit, rules and etiquettes of Salah. In addition, they ought to learn how to teach their children about Salah in a gradual manner, or else their influence on encouraging their children towards Salah will be limited.
Ages 3 – 12
In a tradition narrated from Imam al-Baqir (a), he explains the gradual methodology parents should use when teaching their children about salah. He says [regarding teaching a boy how to pray],
When your child reaches the age of three, tell him to say seven times, Laa ilaaha illallah.
When he reaches the age of three years, seven months, and twenty days, tell him to say seven times, Muhammadun Rasulullah.
When he reaches the age of four, tell him to say seven times, “Sallallahu alaa Muhammadin wa Aalih.”
When he reaches the age of five, ask him to distinguish between his left and right hands, and if he is able to do so, face him towards Qiblah, ask him to perform sajdah.
When he reaches the age of six, he should be taught the Ruku’ and Sujood.
When he reaches the age of seven, he should be told to wash his face and his hands, and then told to pray.
The Imam then continues to explain that when he reaches the age of nine, he should be taught the Wudhu and Salah and that these should be instituted and regulated for the child.
On the basis of this hadith, we can understand the following general instructions:
– Until the age of four, teach a child the fundamentals of the religion, including how to say the above-mentioned key statements
– At five and six, teach the child the basics of Salah. He can, occasionally, pray next to his parents in order to create an attachment to Salah.
– At the age of seven, he should be asked to wash his hands to his wrists and face (not in the form of wudhu, but simply washing them) and to then pray.
– From the age of nine, a boy should be trained in how to offer a correct prayer, and should be expected to pray regularly. [For a girl, such instruction should take place prior to nine].
In addition to teaching their children how to pray, parents should also make use of simple Ahadith and verses of the Qur’an, as well as stories and poems about Salah, in order to present some of its benefits, effects, and importance. They should emphasize themes of Tasleem (submission), Takleef (responsibility), Shukr (gratitude), and Hudoor (concentration / presence) as the underlying philosophy behind the Salah.
Ages 12 – 16
In the early teenage years, children should learn how to perfect their prayers. Parents should answer questions that their children have about Salah in a simple but logical manner. They should make their children familiar with concepts such as Qurb (proximity to Allah), that the entire universe is in the presence of Allah, and that at all times one should remember Allah and be aware of His presence.
Ages 16 – 20
This is the age when youth ought to obtain a deeper and more precise understanding of the philosophy, effects, and rules of Salah. In addition, they should learn about the spiritual conditions for Salah such as Khudoo and Khushoo (outer and inner humility). Parents should give logical explanations for what they say, as at this age youth may be more reluctant to accept simply out of obedience.
They should be taught not only the Wajibaat (obligatory rules), but also the Mustahabbat (recommended rules and etiquette) of Salah, as well as the Mustahab prayers. They should be encouraged to perform Mustahabbat and to refrain from doing things which are Makrooh (disliked).
Source: This article is a translated and summarized excerpt of the first portion of an article on this topic available at www.hawzah.net.